Restless tonight. I sit here.. in my yellow sofa chair - laptop, cushy lifestyle. Little strings attached because i refuse to be toyed. A little alone as a result. The cave of silent existence; peace and toil. I sometimes catch a glimpse of the other side of me - the peaceful side. My room was built for this, but with all in all, there is something left to be acheived. Something to be attained. To be wanted, thinking completion is forward and my key to ecstasy will be seen. What a dry feeling this is.
My reason though for pouring out my lack of contents is not mearly to sap up yours as a reader, but rather to remind you of these moments for the key is simple. There is no other. The only way we will pull ourselves together is not by creating more extentions of ourselves, but to remember that reality is the only extension of our being. Remember being only mind? Go deep into a relaxed state of emptiness and find that wisdom - that wisdom of simply being.
I need not what tomorrow brings for all I know is now. It is all that I am. Who I decided to be know is who I am. There is no way to become it, for it is a swtich in consciousness which gives birth to expansiveness. There is no other. There is only one of you. Pull yourself together.
In this oneness you are at the center of your being. It is the pilot seat of your soul. You are the captain of your vessel, and only here can you chose where life is going. Often our ship is left unmanned as we toil over the tidy details of our ship, but is has no need for decorative purposes. This ship was built for only one function - to sail - and it will sail until it sinks if it should.
Its strange how in this pure state of being - all the answers are there. I've come to realize that all reality is, is a new depth of creation, and with it is a dulled weakened form of depth which is almost impossible to communicate fluently with. No - it is impossible to communicate with. All of these vague ideas we share are but ghosts of their true content. Everything has to be felt through experience, and experience cannot come close to communicate through words. We simply share assocaited experiences by our own personal understanding of the concept. In this way - being is our only teacher, for only from it can we experience true knowledge, wisdom and understanding.
We need no book for this, because we simply are. Simply forgotten. Simply forgotten the identity without the shell. Our focus is on this shell to live out these concepts and make them real in some tangible way - to create, which is why I think all art has failed to acheive its aim, and never will hit its target. Same with science. Its born of its own measurement, and cannot bridge the gap to the mind - for the experiece - the revelation - the miracle is you. It is you.
The key is being in the now. There is no other. You are that I am.
